The Good: Sooooo much good….

• After almost quitting due to frustration in gymnastics, Teegan opted to stick it out. Now his coach is moving him up to the next class. I’m so proud of him for sticking with something that was frustrating him, working it out and experiencing the reward of his commitment and hard work. I know he’s very happy with himself, too.  We totally celebrated with ice cream, of course!
• Yesterday UPS pulled up to my curb and delivered me one shiny new much-coveted 50mm prime lens. I am ridiculously happy. I suck at the manual focus but the quality of my pictures is so much better that I don’t even care. I’m starting to post them over on the photoblog
• There may be a job offer in our near future. Like maybe tomorrow.
• This weekend starts what I am dubbing my Triangle Tour (the reasons for this will be forthcoming and relate to geography)….a one month long venture to see and hang and party (with cheerios and sippee cups, of course) with some of my very very best and most beloved friends and their most adorable families. I was going to call them bloggy friends or adoption friends but truth be told, they are just my friends, even if we happened to meet on a blog and we all adopted. I can barely sleep I am so excited. I am SO excited that I am delusional and in total denial about the combined total of 60 hours plus stops (so another 60 hours! LOL) we will drive to make this happen.  To make things even better, I’ll get to see my entire family along the way, too.  You will just have to stay tuned to see who it is I get the extreme privilege of meeting, I’m not name-dropping yet!
• I finally, finally finished putting together the list of curriculum and resources each of my children will use for the 2008-2009 school year.  I have a child started first grade (aka the Big Leagues), a child starting a virtual academy AND middle school, both and a child starting highschool. This was not easy. I have never EVER put so much time and energy into planning for a school year. WHEW! I am so glad it is done.
• Circus this weekend! Clowns (sorry Melissa!!!) and Highwires. I LOVE the circus!!!!!!

The Bad:

• I watched the HBO documentary China’s Stolen Children the night before arrests were made in Vietnam of those accused of corruption related to international adoption including hundreds of children that went to US families.  It’s pretty clear that crimes against infants and children are pervasive internationally and we in the US drive those crimes through demand by way of adoption.  Each of us that adopts should understand these issues and be prepared to offer an explanation to our children if and when they look for answers. But we aren’t the only ones to blame  - government systems that are failing their most innocent and needy are at the root of the problem and greedy agencies who see adoption as a cash cow industry are right behind them.
• Today Addy got a buddha tattoo. She still loves Buddha so much, except now she is pretty sure his belly is SO big because he needs to poop. hmm. I digress. The face fell off of Buddha (the tattoo) and how tragic is that? Ok, not quite on par with child trafficking. I’m reaching here, I know.

The Ugly:

• The other day, at the grocer, someone approached Addison and patted her arm and said “I have two of these at home”.  Seriously, could you get any more ugly? By these did she mean cute dresses? Or babies? Or daughters? Or Asian adoptees? I think I can guess. And the possessive term “have two of these” as if they are collectibles she owns makes me ill. I am so embarrassed for her and her children. Do people not even think before they speak?
• My house. It is a mess and I need to get it clean so our house sitter doesn’t want to puke and run for the hills. I’m rather ok with the mess - we live here 24/7 so clean is impossible - but when it comes to getting it ready for someone else I sort of envision it being hotel-spotless. Which equals stress to the nth degree. I need to have this done in the next few days. Ugh.

Have any of you caught this new reality show featuring a cast of teen “couples” who hope to start a family sooner rather than later? They are given babies to borrow for 3 days, then toddlers, then pre-teens, teens and finally the elderly. You know I totally had to tune in.

My first impression of the show was that the parents who allowed their tiny babies to be on that show are just nuts. I don’t know if they are being paid something but at a minimum I hope they are reimbursed the therapy costs! haha. I just felt SO bad for those babies. They were at that separation and stranger anxiety stage, they were thrust into unfamiliar homes and cribs with unfamiliar caregivers for several DAYS! While their safety was covered by on-site nannies whose job it was to intervene in the case of an emergency (!!) and hidden cameras that the parents, staying in nearby homes, could watch from with the option to intervene at any time, none of that really addressed the psychological implications of running social experiments on totally clueless infants. Probably the children will be fine now that they are reunited with their parents. It was a one-time thing and only a few days. But still, I sure wouldn’t be volunteering my own baby, ever!!!

I also sort of felt like most of the parents were a little clueless. They were blaming teething, hunger, bad “parenting” on their children’s crying and unhappiness and maybe those things were factors but HELLO - achom’s razor, people! Let’s not overlook the obvious: these babies were probably totally disoriented and at least a little freaked out! This wasn’t like dropping the babes off with grandma for a weekend!

Two of the teens did awesome and I actually think that for one of the couples the goal of the show was sort of lost because the girl was in love with her baby and did a terrific job! She talked about how “bonded” she felt to the baby (after ONE day!!! ha) and how great mothering made her feel! So much for talking the kids out of parenthood through experience! The rest of the kids were total messes. Is that really how almost-adults are these days? Or were these the worst of the worst, hand picked by the casting crew for their ridiculous inability to take care of even themselves much less another human life? I don’t know if I was that much of a mess when I was 17 but I almost felt like calling my ex and asking him and apologizing if I was! haha.

But speaking of the social experiemental angle of it all, it is just unrealistic from beginning to end. First of all, who among us was gifted a huge brand new house, fully furnished, and a car to start our families off with? And food. And a job we didn’t even have to interview for? And how can it be an even remotely realistic experiment when teens don’t also have the benefit of growing and bonding with a child through pregnancy, the pain of childbirth, those early days of learning each other’s needs? Basically what they were doing was babysitting for a few days. There was no parenthood involved.

I can semi-relate to these kids because I definitely wanted children at their age and, indeed, my first child was born when I was just 19. But had I been put through this social experiment I’m fairly sure my response would have been “I still want a baby but I sure don’t want to be a nanny - EVER!”. haha.  In fact, to be honest, I WAS a nanny at that age and DID get to spend my days in a huge lovely house with a wonderful Lexus to tote the kids around in to Gymboree without having to pay the bills and I didn’t love it and learned a lot about how NOT to raise or treat my own kids when I had them and the longer I was around other people’s crazy kids, the more I wanted my own so I could do it right and really enjoy them. So, from my own first hand experience, I can see the experiment backfiring for some. It did for me. I was always wise enough to recognize the innately contrived parts of my experience (the house, the car, the endless food supply) and the challenges and differences (and positives and benefits) that doing it myself would bring. And boy did I have challenges! But boy did I have all those positives and benefits and even more! I can’t say I’d have done it another way if I had it to do over again! Good thing I’m not working on that show, I guess

That said, I look forward to the next few episodes for no other reason than the comedic value!!! It doesn’t seem so cruel when the kids thrust into the new environment are older, wiser, more cunning and more likely to play into it!!! ha. At the end, I think the show will manage to break up a few crappy teen relationships, maybe it will prevent a few pregnancies. But ultimately I think it will teach these kids to NEVER become nannies or work in daycare! ha.

The Awesome Twosome (which is what I like to call Tony and I officially as of just this second - does it make you want to puke a little in your mouth?) is no more. I am all alone, it is all on me, the weight of the world, my kids’ needs, my needs, EVERYTHING.

All drama aside, Tony left for Redmond a few minutes ago and won’t be home until….gulp…tomorrow. Night.

Am I a baby or what?! I am so fun because about 24 hours before Tony has to leave town, any given time, I get all whiney and weepy and OH THE DRAMA. There are the 10000 “What if….” questions that range from “What if the power goes out?” to “What if you die on the plane?” and then the “How will I….” questions and then the flat out “You just can’t go. Tell them you are sorry, you have to stay home.” And then the “Will you fly home if there is an emergency? What exactly constitutes an emergency?” questions. Oh yes, I make him work for his 36 hours of freedom! He just laughs and threatens to create a spreadsheet for easy reference since I ask the same questions every time.

Its just that….we are a team! We work well together, we have nailed down our ebb and flow, we function in unity and he makes all the meals! HOW will I make the meals? I can’t cook! My babies will starve and it will be all his fault. See…there I go again!

Anyway…blahblahblah…woe is me. Tony is gone and he gets to be on camera, and he gets “make-up” and I get…what do I get?!? I hope at least I get some smoked salmon out of the deal like last time! Tony did one of these sort of on-camera roundtable events in March and it was very exciting because someone said the product “sucked dead donkeys”.  I’m hoping for the same level of excitement this time ’round. Of course I will be too busy playing Spider Solitaire and blogging to actually watch but I’ll catch it on youtube later!